Type in a word in the box below or use the site index to search Navigate the Chaos

Today is July 29 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you re-evaluate the world for yourself?” American engineer, physician, and former NASA astronaut Mae Carol Jemison observed: “Never be limited by other people's limited imaginations. If you adopt their attitudes, then the possibility won't exist because you'll have already shut it out...You can hear other people's wisdom, but you've got to re-evaluate the world for yourself.” Today’s reflection involves several elements as outlined by Jemison. First, never be limited by the imagination of others. Allowing others to limit your imagination prohibits you from seeing the world through your own authentic perspective. Second, when you adopt the attitudes of others, you lose the capacity to form your own attitudes. Finally, how you evaluate, and re-evaluate the world, should be as free from the influence of others as possible. On this note of evaluating the world for yourself, it is important to consider the role of ignorance. There are three types of knowledge: things you know, things you know you do not know, and things you do not know you do not know. The last category is synonymous with ignorance. When you evaluate and re-evaluate your world rest assured you will not know what you do not know; therefore, you will be ignorant. As 18th century Thomas Gray noted, sometimes ‘ignorance is bliss.’ Gray was an English poet, letter-writer, classical scholar, and professor at Pembroke College, Cambridge. In 1747 Gray published (anonymously) the poem “Ode to a Distant Prospect of Eton College” and wrote To each his suff'rings: all are men, Condemn'd alike to groan, The tender for another's pain; Th' unfeeling for his own. Yet ah! why should they know their fate? Since sorrow never comes too late, And happiness too swiftly flies. Thought would destroy their paradise. No more; where ignorance is bliss, 'Tis folly to be wise. Gray’s observation ‘ignorance is bliss’ has become part of the nomenclature involved with evaluating a life situation. What is ironic here is that Gray, often regarded as the foremost English-language poet of the mid-18th century, only published thirteen poems during his lifetime. Gray held an evaluation of his world where he was so fearful of criticism and that his worlds would be “mistaken for the words of a flea.” He maintained such an evaluation of his world despite being offered the post of Poet Laureate, which he refused, in 1757. The backstory of American mathematical scientist George Dantzig illustrates Gray’s observation that ‘ignorance is bliss.’ An event in Dantzig's life became the origin of a famous story in 1939, while he was a graduate student at UC Berkeley. Near the beginning of a class for which Dantzig was late, Professor Jerzy Neyman wrote two examples of famously unsolved statistics problems on the blackboard. When Dantzig arrived, he assumed that the two problems were a homework assignment and wrote them down. According to Dantzig: "I arrived late one day at one of Neyman's classes. On the blackboard there were two problems that I assumed had been assigned for homework. I copied them down. A few days later I apologized to Neyman for taking so long to do the homework — the problems seemed to be a little harder than usual." Six weeks later, Dantzig received a visit from an excited professor Neyman, who was eager to tell him that the homework problems he had solved were two of the most famous unsolved problems in statistics. He had prepared one of Dantzig's solutions for publication in a mathematical journal. As Dantzig told it in a 1986 interview in the College Mathematics Journal: “A year later, when I began to worry about a thesis topic, Neyman just shrugged and told me to wrap the two problems in a binder and he would accept them as my thesis.” Years later another researcher, Abraham Wald, was preparing to publish an article that arrived at a conclusion for the second problem and included Dantzig as its co-author when he learned of the earlier solution. Over time Dantzig's name was removed, and facts were altered, but the basic story persisted in the form of an urban legend and as an introductory scene in the movie Good Will Hunting. Dantzig’s ignorance allowed him to evaluate his world, or more specifically the two math problems, from a novel perspective. His perspective was that the two math problems were homework; so he figured out how to do them. Knowing that the two problems were ‘unsolvable’ would have completely altered his ability to evaluate his capacity to solve them. Luckily, Dantzig reflected upon this fact and said: "If I had known that the problems were not homework but were in fact two famous unsolved problems in statistics, I probably would not have thought positively, would have become discouraged, and would never have solved them." How often do you re-evaluate the world for yourself? How often do you look at a problem from a completely different perspective than others usually do? How often do you remind yourself of your potential to think differently and positively? How often do you remind yourself ‘ignorance is bliss?’

Today is July 28 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often are you engaged in magical thinking?" Those who translate their dreams into reality seldom engaged in magical thinking. Magical thinking is the belief that one's ideas, thoughts, wishes, or actions can influence the course of events in the physical world.  As Dr. John A. Johnson wrote in Psychology Today on February 17, 2018 “First, merely expecting something to happen will not make it happen.” Those who navigate the chaos understand that merely expecting something to happen will not make it happen as such magical thinking is reserved for children and, sadly, adults who lack the capacity for mature cognitive processing. Developmental psychologist Jean Piaget noted that young children have difficulty distinguishing between the subjective worlds in their heads and the outer, objective world. According to Piaget, children therefore sometimes believe that their thoughts can directly cause things to happen — for example, thinking angry thoughts about one’s little brother can cause him to fall down the stairs. Piaget referred to this as magical thinking and suggested that most individuals outgrow it by around seven years of age. Children in the toddler stage are becoming more aware of what is around them and looking to make connections that answer their favorite question: Why? They are also in an egocentric stage of development, so it is easy for them to engage in magical thinking and believe that something they do—say, wearing a blue shirt—can have an effect on something totally unrelated, such as having good weather. Unfortunately, Piaget’s observation fell far short as additional research has demonstrated many normal adults continue to engage in various forms of magical thinking. Superstitions are one example of magical thinking in adults. Athletes often follow certain rituals before competition as their magical thinking believes such a routine will have a positive outcome. Putting the right sock on first, eating a specific meal, or wearing the same shirt for an entire season are all examples of magical thinking adults engage in. There is even limited evidence to suggest activating superstitions may increase perceived self-effectiveness and have a corresponding improvement on performance. Far too often, however, magical thinking can be a cause for concern. For example, people who suffer from OCD may engage in magical thinking and develop rituals, such as washing their hands multiple times in a row in the belief that doing this will give them an irrational amount of control over their environment. They may spend countless hours a day engaging in these behaviors and feel a high degree of anxiety and distress when they are not able to perform them. Moreover, a 2014 study published in the journal Cognitive Behavior Therapy suggests that magical thinking may prop up harmful compulsive behaviors in people with OCD by mediating a cognitive bias that results from a distrust of the senses and a primary reliance on imagination. Another illustration of the harmful effects of magical thinking can be found in The Law of Attraction (LOA). LOA states thoughts attract events. It is believed by many to be a universal law by which “Like always attracts like.” The results of positive thoughts are always positive consequences. The same holds true for negative thoughts, always leading to bad outcomes. But the LOA is much more than generalizations: Thinking about red Lamborghinis will bring you red Lamborghinis—always. To the believers, questioning the validity of the LOA is akin to heresy and blasphemy; it creates religious fervor. To the uninitiated, it may seem silly to discuss even the possibility that such a law could exist. The LOA, however, is an example of magical thinking. As Dr. Neil Farber wrote in Throw Away Your Vision Board: The Truth About the Law of Attraction “the law of attraction does not work 99.9% of the time. In fact, believing in this ‘law’ may be detrimental to your health, inhibit your compassion for others, decrease your motivation, and lessen your chance of achieving goals.” “The appetite for magical thinking, Carey wrote, “appears to be rooted in the circuitry of the brain, and for good reason. The sense of having special powers buoys people in threatening situations and helps soothe everyday fears and ward off mental distress. In excess, it can lead to compulsive or delusional behavior. This emerging portrait of magical thinking helps explain why people who fashion themselves skeptics cling to odd rituals that seem to make no sense, and how apparently harmless superstition may become disabling.” In a 1937 speech at the Descartes conference in Paris, French philosopher and winner of the 1927 Nobel Prize in Literature Henri-Louis Bergson proclaimed: “I would say act like a man of thought and think like a man of action.” Action and thought work in tandem. Those who navigate the chaos understand this and realize magical thinking is best left for children. How often do you engage in magical thinking? How often do you ‘act like a person of thought and think like a person of action?’ How often do you believe the best strategy to navigate the chaos and translate one dream after another into reality is to merely think about your goals with the understanding that you do not have to do anything else in order for them to come to fruition? How many people do you personally know who translated their dreams into reality by engaging in magical thinking and nothing else?

Today is July 27 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you allow yourself to be a work in progress?” People who navigate the chaos dedicate themselves to continuously developing their knowledge, skills, and experiences. Translating dreams into reality is a never-ending process and allows one to be in a state of perpetual development if they so choose. Reid Hoffman mentions this in his book The Start-Up of You . According to Reid "we are all works in progress. Each day presents an opportunity to learn more, do more, be more, grow more in our lives and careers. Keeping your career in permanent beta forces you to acknowledge that you have bugs that there is new development to do on yourself that you will need to adapt and evolve." Unfortunately, as you travel your path of navigating the chaos, you will encounter some people who have decades of experience doing one job and believe they are experts and know everything about everything. Far too often, these individuals lack any self-awareness, have an inflated sense of ego, and provide myopic advice often best ignored. Andy Hargadon, head of the entrepreneurship center at the University of California-Davis, says that for many people "twenty years of experience is really one year of experience repeated twenty times.” When you come across such people ask yourself if you really want to listen to someone who has done the same job once and then repeated it 20 or 30 years in a row? Artists provide a good reference point for today’s question. Tasked with creating a work of art out of thin air, artists understand the need for a lifetime dedication to progress perhaps better than most. During the March-September 2016 period, The Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City opened the exhibition “Unfinished: Thoughts Left Visible.” According to The Met’s website “This exhibition addresses a subject critical to artistic practice: the question of when a work of art is finished. Beginning with the Renaissance masters, this scholarly and innovative exhibition examines the term unfinished in its broadest possible sense, including works left incomplete by their makers, which often give insight into the process of their creation, but also those that partake of a non finito —intentionally unfinished—aesthetic that embraces the unresolved and open-ended.” One such example is a small, exquisitely detailed drawing Jan van Eyck made in 1437, in preparation for a painted panel where Saint Barbara sits on a hill near a looming Gothic tower. She holds a thick book and long, graceful palm leaves. The young woman is drawn in black, on a pale background. Van Eyck paints in just a few birds against a blue sky and stopped and, the story goes, declared "It's a masterpiece." No one knows why van Eyck didn't apply paint to the rest of the panel. But he signed and dated it, which usually means an artist thinks it's finished. As Susan Stamberg from NPR noted on May 31, 2016 “Rembrandt was once asked why so many of his works look half-finished. He replied: ‘A work of art is complete when in it the artist has realized his intention.’ Rembrandt implies that it's up to the artist to decide, not to critics, who may say a work appears raw, lacking a complete appearance. For example, Paul Cezanne, who was never satisfied, rarely signed his works. In a letter to his mother, he wrote that finishing things was a goal for imbeciles.” Imbeciles might be a bit harsh, but Cezanne’s point is well taken. One is never finished, and perfection is a fool’s errand. A lifetime commitment to development, however, is within everyone’s reach. So too is the decision as to when one work of art, or aspect of your life is complete, thus allowing you to move on to the next. American playwright and director Tyler Perry exemplifies one who navigated the chaos by realizing he was a work in progress. Perry’s childhood in New Orleans was marked by a pattern of abuse by his father, and the bitterness from the broken relationship became a source of unforgiveness as Perry grew older, eventually moving to Atlanta. It was only after channeling his struggles through writing, that he found a deeper calling. After praying for God to help him to forgive his father, whom he later reconciled with, Perry turned his turbulent story of forgiveness and redemption into the stage play “I Know I’ve Been Changed.” From 1992 to 1998, every time he put on the play it flopped and was considered a financial failure until he revamped it and found success taking it on the road from 1998 to 2000. Perry allowed his life to be a work in progress and as he tweaked his show he made his foray into film transposing many of his stage productions into screen gems, dating back to 2001 when he introduced his play “Diary of a Mad Black Woman” to wide audiences via DVDs that were sold on his Web site. It was the $50.7 million box office success of his 2005 debut “Diary of a Mad Black Woman” that landed him a lucrative first-look, multiyear distribution deal with Lionsgate Entertainment. Perry would go on to create over 20 films and six television shows. When reflecting upon his life Perry said: “You have to understand that what you may perceive to be a failure may very well be an opportunity to learn, grow, get better, and prepare for the next level. If you find the lessons in what you perceive to be failures, then you won’t ever fail at anything. Everything I learned during the ‘learning’ years (that’s what I call them now) has helped me in the ‘harvest’ years (that’s what I’m living in now). Do not be hard on yourself. You have not failed. Find the lesson so you can use it when you get to your harvest.” How often do you allow yourself to be a work in progress? How often do you realize your failures are opportunities for growth? How often do you remind yourself you have the potential to grow every day?

Today is July 26 and the Navigate the Chaos question of the day to consider is “how often do you seek to understand instead of being fearful?” Navigating the chaos, will at some point, require you to choose between fear and understanding. Those who aggressively pursue their dreams deal with this decision more than others who walk slowly upon the path. Either way is fine as there is no right or wrong. But do recognize some people simply have more experience confronting their fear. Like almost everything else in life, the more you practice something the better you are likely to handle it in the future. Fear paralyzes. Fear takes our breath away. Fear stops us in our tracks. These and other side effects of fear are part of the fight or flight response. The fight or flight response is an automatic physiological reaction to an event that is perceived as stressful or frightening. The perception of threat activates the sympathetic nervous system and triggers an acute stress response that prepares the body to fight or flee. These responses are evolutionary adaptations to increase chances of survival in threatening situations. Both the short-term and long-term effects of the fight or flight response can be mitigated by a greater sense of self-awareness, a deeper recognition of the big picture, and a significant effort to understanding one’s life situation. Understanding the physical and cerebral impact fear has is central to today’s reflection. As posted on the Harvard Medical School website on July 6, 2020 “Over the years, researchers have learned not only how and why these reactions occur but have also gained insight into the long-term effects chronic stress has on physical and psychological health. Over time, repeated activation of the stress response takes a toll on the body. Research suggests that chronic stress contributes to high blood pressure, promotes the formation of artery-clogging deposits, and causes brain changes that may contribute to anxiety, depression, and addiction. More preliminary research suggests that chronic stress may also contribute to obesity, both through direct mechanisms (causing people to eat more) or indirectly (decreasing sleep and exercise).” The French Physicist Marie Curie once wrote: “Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less.” People who successfully navigate the chaos intentionally choose understanding as a function over fear. Curie had to overcome barriers that were placed in her way because she was a woman, in both her native and her adoptive country. As she addressed challenges in both her personal and professional life Curie maintained a life-long commitment to understanding. As a child Curie took after her father, Wladyslaw, a math and physics instructor. A top student in her secondary school, Curie could not attend the men-only University of Warsaw. She instead continued her education in Warsaw's "floating university," a set of underground, informal classes held in secret. Both Curie and her sister Bronya dreamed of going abroad to earn an official degree, but they lacked the financial resources to pay for more schooling. Undeterred, Curie worked out a deal with her sister. She would work to support Bronya while she was in school and Bronya would return the favor after she completed her studies. For roughly five years, Curie worked as a tutor and a governess. She used her spare time to study, reading about physics, chemistry, and math. In 1891, Curie finally made her way to Paris where she enrolled at the Sorbonne. She threw herself into her studies, but this dedication had a personal cost. With little money, Curie survived on buttered bread and tea, and her health sometimes suffered because of her poor diet. Curie completed her master's degree in physics in 1893 and earned another degree in mathematics the following year. She was the first woman to win a Nobel Prize, the first person and only woman to win twice, the only person to win a Nobel Prize in two different sciences and was part of the Curie family legacy of five Nobel Prizes. She was also the first woman to become a professor at the University of Paris, and in 1995 became the first woman to be entombed on her own merits in the Panthéon in Paris. Much like Curie’s pursuit of understanding, South African President Nelson Mandela discussed his pursuit of understanding over fear in his publication Long Walk to Freedom and wrote: “Time and again, I have seen men and women risk and give their lives for an idea. I have seen men stand up to attacks and torture without breaking, showing a strength and resiliency that defies the imagination. I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. I felt fear myself more times than I can remember, but I hid it behind a mask of boldness. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” How often do you seek to understand instead of being fearful? How often do you think about the long-term and short-term impact of fear, stress, and anxiety? How often do you remind yourself that ‘courage is not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it?’ How often do you seek to understand your life situation as opposed to being afraid of it?

Today is July 25 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you find yourself waiting for success?” Today’s question and reflection, like others throughout this series, involves a nuanced understanding and appreciation. Navigating the chaos involves both action and inaction. The key is to understand when to leverage both strategies. The question for today reminds us to act and refuse to wait. The art of living well does indeed sometimes require one to abandon patience. One such exercise to do so stems from German American billionaire and co-founder of PayPal Peter Thiel who posited the question “How can you achieve your 10-year plan in the next 6 months?” Now those who navigate the chaos often ask themselves this question and understand full well that achieving their 10-year plan in six months might not be possible, but they try to anyway in order to see how far they can travel down their path. Even thinking about the question affords one the opportunity to think differently. Generally, if you attempt this strategy you will often find yourself much further along than you thought possible. Putting Thiel’s exercise into motion also forces one to rethink their 10-year plan. As discussed elsewhere in this Navigate the Chaos series, one should have as many dreams as two lifetimes to achieve. Thus, a 10-year plan should be edited, updated, and refreshed as much as possible. To better understand the nuance between patience and action, one should assess how time is spent. After all, everyone has 24 hours in a day so the more insight you have on how you spend your time will help you navigate the chaos and practice the art of living well. In this first example let’s calculate the amount of potential time available during an average month. Most months have 720 hours (30 days X 24 hours). If you slept 8 hours per day (8 hours X 30 days = 240 hours), you’d have 480 hours left. If you worked 40 hours per week (40 hours X 4 weeks = 160 hours), you’d have 320 hours left. If you spend 4 hours eating per day (4 hours X 30 days = 120 hours), you’d have 120 hours left for one month. When multiplied by 12 months for the year, that equals 1440 hours available to you. Even if you find yourself extremely busy with work and other obligations most people have at least 30 available hours per month for a total of 360 hours for the year. What exactly are you doing with your available hours? If you are unable to identify available hours why do you think that is? Parents of young children will find this exercise severely limiting because of their responsibilities. Nevertheless, a re-examination of how one spends time is worth doing a few times each year. Doing so might allow you to find the time to either wait for success or go ahead without it. American comedian Jonathan Winters once said, “I couldn't wait for success, so I went ahead without it. If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to meet it.” Successful people who navigate the chaos and practice the art of living well like Winters understand that forward progress to any degree is far better than standing still. Born in 1925 Winters quit high school at 17 and joined the Marines. After serving two and half years in the Pacific Theater during World War II Winters returned home to Ohio. His career began as a result of a lost wristwatch, about six or seven months after his marriage to Eileen Schauder on September 11, 1948. The newlyweds could not afford to buy another one. Then Eileen read about a talent contest in which the first prize was a wristwatch and encouraged Jonathan to “go down and win it.” She was certain he could…and he did. His performance led to a disc jockey job, where he was supposed to introduce songs and announce the temperature. Gradually his ad libs, personas and antics took over the show. He performed in Columbus, Ohio for two and a half years, quitting his job at a television station in 1953 when they refused him a $5.00 raise. After promising his wife that he would return to Ohio if he did not make it in a year and with $56.46 in his pocket, he moved to New York City. After obtaining an agent he began stand-up routines in various nightclubs. His big break occurred when he worked for Alistair Cooke on the CBS Sunday morning show Omnibus . During this time Winters suffered a nervous breakdown, was eventually diagnosed with manic depression (bipolar disorder today) and spent 8 months in a private mental hospital. Over time Winters learned to manage his condition and he went on to record many albums and appear in dozens of movies and television appearances. Winters did not wait for success and instead went out and despite his mental health issues still found a way to move ahead without success. He would go on to release over 50 albums in his career and received 11 Grammy nominations. He won the Grammy Award for Best Album for Children for his contribution to an adaptation of The Little Prince in 1975 and the Grammy Award for Best Spoken Comedy Album for Crank(y) Calls in 1996. Are you waiting for success? Or are you moving forward without it? If your ship does not come in, do you swim out to meet it? How do you differentiate between patience and action? How often do you reflect upon the need to be patient compared to taking action? What can you do to accomplish your 10-year plan in six months?

Today is July 24 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you do choose life and make caring for yourself a priority?” Those who leverage their mind, body, and spirit to navigate the chaos and translate one dream after another into reality practice self-care in order to maintain their mental, physical, and emotional health over the extended period of time required to achieve their goals. According to the World Health Organization, self-care is “the ability of individuals, families, and communities to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and to cope with illness and disability with or without the support of a healthcare provider.” This definition includes a number of factors that emphasize taking responsibility for your own health and wellness. Self-care, in short, refers to daily habits and lifestyles which influence health management. This entire Navigate the Chaos series is designed to promote self-awareness in order to encourage self-care and nurture self-love. Parker Palmer wrote in Let Your Life Speak: Listening for the Voice of Vocation , “Self-care is never a selfish act - it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer others. Anytime we can listen to true self and give the care it requires, we do it not only for ourselves, but for the many others whose lives we touch.” If you believe self-care is selfish, perhaps today’s reflection can help you evolve your thinking into a more compassionate approach as you look to navigate the chaos and practice the art of living well. Robyn Stevens learned the hard way how important how thoughts, words, and actions are toward her self-care. Olympic race walker Stevens 38, qualified for the Tokyo Games on June 26, 2021, by winning the 20-kilometer race walk in the U.S. Olympic trials in Springfield, Oregon. Stevens traveled an improbable road to the 2021 Summer Olympics in the arcane sport of race walking; especially since it came 17 years after she quit competing at San Jose State because of an eating disorder. Stevens started to recognize signs of an eating disorder senior year in high school. During her freshmen year running track in college her early warning signs had progressed into an obsession. She started starving herself, and when she did eat, would vomit to the point of exhaustion, and then go workout. She was on the verge of losing her life. Stevens said she had no one to talk to about her condition while at the University of Wisconsin-Parkside, so she transferred to San Jose State. She told her friend “If I don’t leave, I think I might die. I’m on an unhealthy path right now.” At this point in her life Stevens realized she “needed to choose life” and wanted to stay alive. Stevens had the self-awareness to realize that she needed support if she was going to figure out how to navigate the chaos of her situation. But then tragedy struck. In February 2004 fellow race walker and friend Al Heppner killed himself by jumping off a bridge in San Diego County after failing to make the 50K Olympic team. Stevens noted that Heppner “just gave up on himself,” and realized her mental state at the time resembled Heppner’s since she was “no longer focused on winning and solely focused on getting skinny.” Stevens called her mom to say she was done with competitive sport because it had become a toxic environment. She’d finish out the season with SJSU and then quit. “I hate myself and I hate food,” she told her mother. “How do I live?” It would take several years of continued struggle to learn how to manage her relationship with food and feel good about herself. As Stevens recalled “I pretty much reached full recovery in 2009. Around that time, I took a group therapy class and learned I had general anxiety disorder. I started understanding nutrition better. I pay attention to what makes my body feel energized and good, and what makes it feels draggy and tired.” Stevens had no intention to returning to elite level competition when she stepped away in 2004. Her return to race walking was the result of therapy prescribed by her doctor when she hit her head and suffered a concussion. Her doctor recommended walking since running, swimming, and biking would be too strenuous for her brain. So, Stevens started walking, entered one competition after another, and 17 years after leaving the sport, qualified for the 2021 Summer Olympics. In her own words Stevens details how she navigated the chaos: “Be your own best friend. Whenever anyone begins to overly obsess about something, that's an indicator something is out of balance and there's a need to do a mind-body wellness check. Trust yourself and don’t give up. If you get off track, do what you need to do to get back on, but realize everybody has their own course. What do you need to do that’s the healthiest for you? Don’t be afraid to do what’s best for you and take care of yourself.” Stevens learned the hard way how to navigate the chaos of a severe eating disorder. How often do you engage in self-care? Do you believe self-care is a selfish act? If so, why? How often do you realize self-care is the only gift you can offer others? Are you your own best friend? Have you noticed yourself obsessing over something? If so, what did you do about it? What do you need to do that is healthiest for you? While other Navigate the Chaos posts discuss the need to be obsessed about translating your dreams into reality, how often do you remind yourself to check in with your health to ensure the obsession does not overshadow self-care?

Today is July 23 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you allow envy to devour you?” Russian author Alexander Solzhenitsyn said: "Our envy of others devours us most of all." Successful people who navigate the chaos spend little, if any, time allowing envy to devour them or distract them from achieving their dreams. For those navigating the chaos it is easy to fall prey to envy. Person A has some position, status, or wealth that Person B wants. Person B has a variety of options to obtain what Person A has, but the real question Person B needs to ask is ‘do I really want what Person A has or am I envious?’ If envy is involved, then why? It is important to note, however, that envy can sometimes serve as a catalyst for someone trying to navigate the chaos. In an August 10, 2015, New Yorker article Maria Konnikova, summarized the work of researchers Richard Smith and Niels van de Ven regarding envy. Smith, a psychologist at the University of Kentucky suggests envy arises from a combination of two factors: relevance and similarity. Relevance, as defined by Smith, happens when an envied advantage must be meaningful on a personal level. For example, a ballerina’s beautiful dance is unlikely to cause envy in a lawyer, unless the lawyer once had professional dancing aspirations. Similarity, on the other hand, involves some degree of comparison. Konnikova wrote “Even though we’re both writers, I’m unlikely to envy Ernest Hemingway. Aristotle, in describing envy, quotes the saying ‘potter against potter.’ When we admire someone, we do so from a distance. When we envy someone, we picture ourselves in their place.” Today’s question challenges you to reflect and increase your self-awareness when it comes to admiration and envy. Admiration and envy can seem like opposites: admiration inspires us, while envy drags us down. But the psychologist Niels van de Ven, of Tilburg University, in the Netherlands, argues that this duality may not fully capture the emotion’s real complexity. When he examined the concept in cultures across the world, he found that the word envy has dual meetings in other languages and involves a more nuanced interpretation. In English, envy is envy. But in other languages, envy invokes the nuanced range of benign envy, malicious envy, admiration, and resentment. In his examination of envy, author Neel Burton wrote “The pain of envy is not caused by the desire for the advantages of others per se, but by the feeling of inferiority and frustration occasioned by their lack in ourselves. The distraction of envy and the dread of arousing it in others paradoxically holds us back from achieving our fullest potential. Envy also costs us friends and allies, and, more generally, tempers, restrains, and undermines even our closest relationships. In some cases, it can even lead to acts of sabotage, as with the child who breaks the toy that he knows he cannot have. Over time, our anguish and bitterness can lead to physical health problems such as infections, cardiovascular diseases, and cancers; and mental health problems such as depression, anxiety, and insomnia. We are, quite literally, consumed by envy.” One of the characteristics of modern life is the new phenomenon of the intersection of envy and social media. With over 4.5 billion people around the world currently using one or more social media platforms, the levels, complexities, and dynamics involved with envy have taken on a whole new meaning. Alexandra Samuel, author of Work Smarter with Social Media proclaimed “it feels like media has given envy a new lease on life. Envy is so profoundly woven into the experience of using social media that it has brought the term FOMO into common currency: Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) is an almost inevitable byproduct of witnessing other people’s vacations, parties, and purchases through social media.” When you are too busy navigating the chaos you have little, if any, time of FOMO. Samuel goes on to list some of the more common social media catalysts that could potentially spark envy among viewers. “My envy can be inspired by the personal or the professional: by your delightful and picturesque vacation, or your new and fabulous job. It can be provoked by something shallow and materialistic, like the boots you are wearing in your latest selfie, or by something human and meaningful, like your child’s latest academic success. It can be directed towards your success in a field of endeavor we share, like writing, or a field of endeavor I wish I’d thought to pursue, like the law. It can focus on something tangible, like the size of the mansion you just bought, or something intangible, like how you’re able to be content in your tiny bungalow.” For those navigating the chaos and putting in the daily work required to translate dreams into reality, they spend little if any time being devoured by being envious of others. How often do you allow envy to devour you? How often do you consider the difference between admiring someone and being envious of them? How often do you remind yourself that being envious of others can prohibit you from achieving your fullest potential? How often do you see a social media post, become envious, and then experience FOMO?

Today is July 22 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you rely on others for your happiness?" To spark today’s reflection, recall the words of Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard who wrote “A man who as a physical being is always turned toward the outside, thinking that his happiness lies outside him, finally turns inward and discovers that the source is within him.” The research is overwhelmingly clear: “the pressure to be happy makes people less happy. Organizing your life around trying to become happier, making happiness the primary objective of life gets in the way of actually becoming happy.” Research within the field of positive psychology continues to illustrate that having purpose and meaning in life increases overall well-being and life satisfaction, improves mental and physical health, enhances resiliency, enhances self-esteem, and decreases the chances of depression. "Happiness without meaning characterizes a relatively shallow, self-absorbed or even selfish life. What sets human beings apart from animals is not the pursuit of happiness, which occurs across the natural world, but the pursuit of meaning, which is unique to humans.” People who navigate the chaos like actor Taraji P. Henson understand they are responsible for their own happiness. Another extension of this question is ‘why would you ever rely on others for your happiness?’ What is it in you that rejects the notion you provide your own happiness? Translating your dreams into reality is your responsibility and therefore, so too is your happiness. Henson graduated from Oxon Hill High School in Oxon Hill, Maryland, in 1988. She then attended North Carolina Agricultural and Technical State University where she studied electrical engineering before transferring to Howard University to study drama. To pay for college, she worked mornings as a secretary at The Pentagon and evenings as a singing-dancing waitress on a dinner-cruise ship, the Spirit of Washington. With her one-year-old son in hand, she walked across the stage to receive her diploma at Howard University. After college she set out for Hollywood and wondered if she had made a mistake dragging her then 1-year-old far away from her family, her hometown, everything she knew and loved. In an interview Henson said “I remember when I said I was going to move out here [L.A.] and my son was like a year old at the time, and I had no money. Fresh out of college with dreams and stars in my eyes. Some people thought I was crazy. My mom was like ‘You’re going to starve!’ But they are all proud because I had a dream. In my opinion, if you’re not dreaming, you’re not living.” At 26, she found an agent and landed a number of TV roles, including ER and Felicity ; then things turned around even more. In 2001, she co-starred in director John Singleton’s Baby Boy , a drama addressing the absentee father epidemic, and in 2005, made a head-turning splash in Terrence Howard’s urban drama Hustle & Flow , which garnered her a Best Actress nomination from the Image Awards. She also sang the film’s Oscar-winning song, “It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp,” performing it at the 2006 Academy Awards – just two weeks after her father lost a battle with cancer. In 2016, Henson starred in the film Hidden Figures, a major box-office success nominated for numerous awards, including three Oscars (Best Picture, Best Adapted Screenplay, and Best Supporting Actress for Octavia Spencer) and two Golden Globes (Best Supporting Actress for Spencer and Best Original Score). It won the Screen Actors Guild Award for Outstanding Performance by a Cast in a Motion Picture. In a speech given at the 2018 Women in Film awards ceremony, Henson said: “I finally get to L.A. graduate, have a kid in college and I have to pursue my dream because if I don't what am I teaching my son? So, I moved to California with seven hundred dollars in my pocket and my toddler. And I had to fight the good fight because people are telling me ‘You can't do this.’ They say ‘Are you crazy? You're moving to California with your son? You'll never make it.’ I was twenty-six when I decided to come here. There's the age thing. Oh, you're too old. If you listen to people and if you allow people to project their fears onto you, you won't live. What if I believed those people who told me that when I became pregnant in college that I wouldn't finish? … Everything in life that is coming to you is going to come through you. It starts inside of you. Whether it is love from another, that love must start within you. If you do not know how to take care of yourself or care for yourself first, how are you going to teach someone else to? You need to fight for your goals with such tenacity. You are the temple, and you have control. If you are in a bad situation it's up to you to get out of it. You can't give another human the responsibility of your happiness.” How often do you rely on others for your happiness? How often do you remind yourself that ‘the source of happiness lies within you?’ How often do you let others drown out your dreams? How often do you realize that ‘everything in life that is coming to you is going to come through you since it starts inside of you?’ How often do you remind yourself that you are in control of how you pursue your goals and leverage your mind, body, and spirit to navigate the chaos? How often do you get out of a bad situation? How often do you give another human the responsibility of your happiness?

Today is July 21 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you reflect upon your relationships?” Those who navigate the chaos understand they have multiple relationships to tend to as they travel down their path of translating their dreams into reality. We have relationships with ourselves, each other, strangers, colleagues, family members, and nature. We do not live in a vacuum and have many relationships over our lifetime. Perhaps the one relationship that goes often overlooked is our ability to connect with nature. It offers, after all, a tremendous benefit for those navigating the chaos. Unfortunately, never have we been so far from merging with the natural world and so divorced from nature. By 2050, 66% of the world’s population is projected to live in cities. According to a study sponsored by the Environmental Protection Agency, the average American spends 93% of his or her time indoors. But the good news is that even a small amount of time in nature can have an impact on your health. A two-hour forest bath will help you to unplug from technology and slow down. It will bring you into the present moment and de-stress and relax you. In Japan, the practice of forest bathing, or shinrin-yoku has existed for centuries. Shinrin in Japanese means “forest,” and yoku means “bath.” So shinrin-yoku means bathing in the forest atmosphere or taking in the forest through your senses. This is not exercise, or hiking, or jogging. It is simply being in nature, connecting with it through your senses of sight, hearing, taste, smell, and touch. Shinrin-yoku is like a bridge. By opening your senses, it bridges the gap between you and the natural world. In other words, being in nature helps you reflect upon your relationship with the larger world around you. Studies have confirmed that spending time within a forest setting can reduce psychological stress, depressive symptoms, and hostility, while at the same time improving sleep and increasing both vigor and a feeling of liveliness," reports Mother Earth News. "These subjective changes match up nicely with objective results reported in nearly a dozen studies involving 24 forests—lower levels of cortisol and lower blood pressure and pulse rate." Just the smell of trees has health benefits. "Chemicals secreted by trees, known as phytoncides, have been linked with improved immune defense as well as a reduction in anxiety and increase in pain threshold," reports Slate in an article on the health benefits of nature. Studies have also shown that children with ADHD who play in a green outdoor environment, rather than an indoor or constructed environment, show a decrease in their symptoms. Even just living around more trees means a healthier overall mental state. A recent study showed that Londoners who live near trees take fewer antidepressants. While the benefits of taking a walk through a forest are clear, what is less understood is the value of silence one encounters during such an experience. British philosopher Alan Watts wrote Hermits in New York to help people understand the value of becoming quiet to see and hear. People who successfully navigate the chaos understand the value of solitude. Watts wrote: “Let us take hermits. People today think being a hermit is a very unhealthy thing to do. Very antisocial, does not contribute anything to everybody else - because everybody else is busy contributing like blazes, and a few people have to run off and get out of the way. But I'll tell you what hermits realize. If you go off into a far, far forest and get incredibly quiet, you'll come to understand that you're connected with everything. That every little insect that comes buzzing around you is a messenger, and that little insect is connected with human beings everywhere else. You can hear. You become incredibly sensitive in your ears, and you hear far-off sounds. And just by the very nature of isolating yourself and becoming quiet, you become intensely aware of your relationship with everything else that's going on.” Now for some, who have an ego-centric view of the world where they are the center of the universe, today’s question will probably go unnoticed. For others, however, those who successfully navigate the chaos, they understand they are part of a larger world. The universe revolves around the sun, not their ego. To navigate the chaos it is important to reflect upon your relationships with yourself, those closest to you, strangers, those who are unable to help you, and nature. How you relate matters. Somewhere along your path you will need the support, help, and encouragement of those around you. Nature will play a role in how you succeed. Albert Einstein wrote: “A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.” How often do you reflect upon your relationships? How often do you ‘widen your circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty? How often do you spend time outdoors with no real purpose other than being one with the surrounding nature?

Today is July 20 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often can you just DO?” Few people DO, however, and as a result, DO NOT navigate the chaos. In 1960, pioneering American artists Sol LeWitt and Eva Hesse met for the first time and became close friends. Hesse began suffering from creative block and self-doubt shortly after moving from New York to Germany with her husband. She reached out to her LeWitt for counsel and consolation, and he replied with a spectacular letter dated April 14, 1965. The following is an excerpt (Warning contains R rated language): “Dear Eva, it will be almost a month since you wrote to me and you have possibly forgotten your state of mind (I doubt it though). You seem the same as always, and being you, hate every minute of it. Don’t! Learn to say ‘Fuck You’ to the world once in a while. You have every right to. Just stop thinking, worrying, looking over your shoulder, wondering, doubting, fearing, hurting, hoping for some easy way out, struggling, grasping, confusing, itching, scratching, mumbling, bumbling, grumbling, humbling, stumbling, numbling, rambling, gambling, tumbling, scumbling, scrambling, hitching, hatching, bitching, moaning, groaning, honing, boning, horse-shitting, hair-splitting, nit-picking, piss-trickling, nose sticking, ass-gouging, eyeball-poking, finger-pointing, alleyway-sneaking, long waiting, small stepping, evil-eyeing, back-scratching, searching, perching, besmirching, grinding, grinding, grinding away at yourself. Stop it and just DO!... you are not responsible for the world — you are only responsible for your work — so DO IT. And don’t think that your work has to conform to any preconceived form, idea, or flavor. It can be anything you want it to be.” In 2016, actor Benedict Cumberbatch gave a dramatic reading of LeWitt’s impassioned five-page missive, which remains the closest thing to a personal creative credo LeWitt ever committed to words. Hesse was a German-born American sculptor known for her pioneering work in materials such as latex, fiberglass, and plastics. She is one of the artists who ushered in the post-minimal art movement in the 1960s. In 1962, Hesse met and married sculptor Tom Doyle (1928–2016); they divorced in 1966. Hesse graduated from New York's School of Industrial Art at the age of 16, and in 1952 she enrolled in the Pratt Institute of Design. She dropped out only a year later. When Hesse was 18, she interned at Seventeen magazine. During this time, she also took classes at the Art Students League and eventually received her BA from Yale University in 1959. While at Yale, Hesse studied under Josef Albers and was heavily influenced by Abstract Expressionism. After Yale, Hesse returned to New York, where she became friends with many other young minimalist artists, including Sol LeWitt, Donald Judd, Yayoi Kusama, and others. Her close friendship with Sol LeWitt continued until the end of her life. Both Hesse and LeWitt went on to become influential artists; their friendship stimulated the artistic development of their work. The two frequently wrote to one another, and in 1965 LeWitt wrote the aforementioned letter where he famously counseled a young doubting Eva to "Stop [thinking] and just DO!” In October 1969, she was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and she died on May 29, 1970, after three failed operations within a year. Her death at the age of 34 ended a career that would become highly influential, despite spanning only a decade. Her art is often viewed in the context of the many struggles of her life. This includes escaping from the Nazis, her parents' divorce, the suicide of her mother when she was 10, her failed marriage, and the death of her father. Despite all these struggles during her brief 34 years, Hesse found a way to navigate the chaos and become one of the most influential artists of the 20th century. A 2016 documentary entitled Eva Hesse , premiered in New York, illustrated her painful background. Directed by Marcie Begleiter, the film tells the story of Hesse's tragically foreshortened life and "focuses on those years of artistic emergence, a period of rapid development and furious productivity, with few parallels in the history of art." How often can you just DO? How often can you just DO? How often are you thinking about DOING instead of actually DOING? How often are you worry about what others may think about you and your work? How often are you paranoid and looking over your shoulder? How often are you hoping for some easy way out of navigating the chaos? How often are you fearing that your work will not be ‘good enough’ (whatever that means)? How often are you struggling to DO and instead find yourself NOT DOING? How often are you stumbling along the path of navigating the chaos and, as a result, not DOING what it is you want to DO? How often are you bitching about how unfair life is and, as a result, you wind up NOT DOING what it is you want to DO? How often do you remind yourself ‘you are not responsible for the world – you are only responsible for your work?’ Is there anyone in your life who can help remind you to just DO? Have you ever reminded someone to just DO?

Today is July 19 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you resign yourself to the shutting away of life?” Those who navigate the chaos choose otherwise and realize the shutting away of life is a sign of giving up. Translating dreams into reality requires daily momentum and to give in to the shutting away of life would prohibit even the smallest of steps forward. Poets often write about such matters and have provided us with many examples over the years. Poets dwell on the specific. They concentrate their pen on the slightest of human endeavors. Looking inward, poets often speak from the heart and create stories to convey important messages. Two such poets that mused on the end of life were Edna St. Vincent Millay and Alfred Lord Tennyson. American poet and playwright Edna St. Vincent Millay received the Pulitzer Prize for Poetry in 1923, the third woman to win the award for poetry, and was also known for her feminist activism. In 1904, her mother Cora officially divorced Millay's father and, with Millay’s two sisters, moved often living in poverty. Cora traveled with a trunk full of classic literature, including Shakespeare and Milton, which she read to her children. The family settled in a small house on the property of Cora's aunt in Camden, Maine, where Millay would write the first of the poems that would bring her literary fame. The three sisters were independent and spoke their minds, which did not always sit well with the authority figures in their lives. After graduating Vassar College Millay moved to New York City and continued to write poetry. One of Millay’s well-known poems is Dirge Without Music where she writes “I am not resigned to the shutting away of loving hearts in the hard ground. So it is, and so it will be, for so it has been, time out of mind; into the darkness they go, the wise and the lovely. Crowned with lilies and with laurel they go; but I am not resigned. Down, down, down into the darkness of the grave. Gently they go, the beautiful, the tender, the kind; quietly they go, the intelligent, the witty, the brave. I know. But I do not approve. And I am not resigned.” For those unfamiliar with St. Vincent Millay’s poem they would have been introduced to it in the 2017 American comedy-drama film The Hero directed and edited by Brett Haley and written by Haley and Marc Basch. It stars Sam Elliott, Laura Prepon, Krysten Ritter, Nick Offerman and Katharine Ross and follows an aging movie star who deals with his terminal illness. In his poem Ulysses , written in 1833 and published in 1842 in his well-received second volume of poetry, British poet Alfred Lord Tennyson echoed similar thoughts and wrote “Though much is taken, much abides; and though; We are not now that strength which in old days; Moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are, One equal temper of heroic hearts, Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will; To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.” For those unfamiliar with Tennyson they would have been introduced to it in the 2012 James Bond film Skyfall . In the movie actor Dame Judi Dench, who portrays ‘M’ the Head of the Secret Intelligence Service MI 6, recites the poet’s words towards the end of the film. What is most interesting here is the intersection of old poetry and modern film. Examples of navigating the chaos are all around us. The preponderance of support, examples, and stories served as a catalyst for me to catalog as many as possible into a daily question post. Here we have two poems from the past included in the scripts of two modern films. What a beautiful intersection of modernity and antiquity. Audiences for both films were challenged to ask if they were shutting away life or yielding to time and fate. Brazilian gymnast and World Champion in the floor exercise, Diego Hypolito knows something about navigating the chaos and not yielding to time and fate. He competed in the Beijing 2008 Olympics and fell on his back. Four years later in London 2012 he fell on his face. He was devasted to have fallen for a second time at the Olympic games but continued navigating the chaos. At the 2016 Olympic games in Rio, he completed a near perfect routine and finished with a silver medal. In an interview after the medal ceremony, he said: “In Beijing I landed on my backside, in London I landed on my face...this time I landed on my feet, with my head held high." How often have you resigned to the shutting away of life? Do you strive, to seek and find and not to yield? If you have been made weak by time and fate, do you remain strong in will?

Today is July 18 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you learn lessons from history?” Navigating the chaos requires one to recognize forward progress is dependent upon a bias towards action, an indefatigable spirit, and a willingness to travel outside of their comfort zone. These three characteristics allow individuals the ability to view their past actions and extract valuable lessons. Since reflection is involved, however, it is important to note two distinct yet related dynamics. First, do not get stuck in the past during your reflection as doing so will cause you to miss the present. Second, the lessons you learn from reflection are yours and yours alone. It is up to you to reflect and engage with the past in order to actively learn from it. But then it is time to move on. Failing to recognize these two dynamics jeopardizes your ability to navigate the chaos and practice the art of living well. Author Aldous Huxley noted “That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons that history has to teach.” Huxley’s point is well take in that it reminds us of three imperatives: a)history has tremendous potential in what it can teach, b)people fail to learn from history, and c)the greatest lesson of history is that people fail to learn from history. A similar quote is attributed to writer and philosopher George Santayana "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it." An extension of these observations on the failure of remembering history is the oft quoted definition of insanity as “doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.” What is interesting about the insanity quote is that it is misattributed to Albert Einstein. There appears to be no evidence to suggest Einstein ever articulated a definition of insanity. According to the web site Quote Investigator, there were three variations on this theme published in 1981. The first iteration came from Jessie Potter, the featured speaker at the 1981 Woman to Woman conference focused on education and family relationships, who said “If you always do what you’ve always done, you always get what you’ve always gotten.” The second iteration came from an anonymous attended of an Al-Anon meeting who said during the group session “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” And the third iteration came from a November 1981 pamphlet from Narcotics Anonymous “Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results.” Best-selling author Veronica Chambers learned from her history and in so doing reclaimed her self-esteem and unlocked a world of possibility. In a January 20, 2020, New York Times article, Chambers details how she quit working at a magazine and for a woman who would never respect her. “Once upon a time, I worked at a magazine, reporting to a white woman who, early in our working relationship, told me that she didn’t consider me a threat because ‘a black woman will never have this job.’ She then proceeded to use every one of my ideas to completely redesign the magazine we worked for. It was the end of a moment in publishing when such a thing as a “big magazine job” still existed. I hung on because I really wanted to be an editor in chief one day and knew that quitting would take me out of the game.” But after spending one amazing day at the beach with her family, Chambers knew it was time to quit. As she wrote in her piece: “What came next was that I wrote four New York Times best sellers. I won two James Beard awards. I had a novel optioned by a producer I had long admired. I taught at Stanford University and Smith College. I was able to carve out an extraordinary amount of time to spend with my poor daughter who had started kindergarten sleep deprived and with a slight bellyache from me shoving fries down her throat in a moving car and calling it dinner. I did not want to just quit my job, I wanted to make a better life for myself. That came with a lot of hard work, and even overworking myself, but I did it for myself and on my own terms.” Chambers came to realize that she was failing to learn from the lessons of history, doing the same thing and getting what she always did, and doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. She could have stayed at the magazine and tried to wait until she was anointed editor-in-chief. But like so many people that navigate the chaos, she came to realize that her editor-in-chief goal eventually took a back seat to a new and more prominent one of making a better life for herself. Today’s question challenges you to examine your current life situation and honestly assess if you are doing the same thing today that you did last month or last year and expecting different results. Those who navigate the chaos can answer that question honestly and without hesitation. For others, however, doing so is too painful so they convince themselves things are indeed different and better when the opposite is true. How you answer determines your ability to translate your dreams into reality so be careful and look at your current life situation and ask if you are learning lessons from history. How often do you learn from the lessons of history? How often do you find yourself doing the same thing over and over expecting different results? Who or what is preventing you from learning from the lessons of history? Have you ever helped anyone learn lessons from their past? Who has helped you learn lessons from your past?